I cannot believe that neither Joe, Debbi nor Nightstorm has done this yet:

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"Dear CREED Fan, (Dear Sucker,)

"The band has heard that you are unhappy with the quality of the recent CREED show in Chicago.
(We've sold more records than we can count, have a ton of money, and absolutely no concept of reality, so what do you expect?)

"We apologize if you don't feel that the show was up to the very high standards set by our previous shows in Chicago.
(Get used to it. Our best years are behind us so from now on just be happy we showed up.)

We also understand and appreciate the fact that there has been much concern about Scott's health (mind your own fucking business) and we want to assure everyone that he is doing very well and is taking a much needed break at home in Orlando after a very long and rigorous touring year. (He's fucking hookers and doing blow as we speak!)

"The band has plans to start writing material for their next record later this year and plan to return to Chicago next year to play a show that will hopefully be better than any of the numerous shows we've played there.
(They'll be back in Chicago next year, so buy another ticket and maybe it'll be better, maybe it won't. Just so long as you spend your money on us, that's all that matters.)

"For now we hope that you can take some solace in the fact that you definitely experienced the most unique of all CREED shows and may have become part of the unusual world of rock and roll history! (For now we hope that you can take some solace in the fact that you spent about $50 for a ticket to watch Scott Stapp lay on his back and fuck up the songs. Take pride in knowing the great Scott Stapp was fucked up in your town! It's a story you can pass on to your grandchildren.)

Again, we apologize if you didn't enjoy the show but remember, 'It's only rock and roll but we like it!' (Thanks for spending your money assholes.)

"Have a great year! CREED" (See you in hell, Creed)

Jani Bon Neil & OZZY STILLBOURNE
With Sludge Wide Open

(cut/pasted from Creedpit, originated on http://www.metal-sludge.com/MainPage.htm )